This Is What a Virgin Looks Like.

Remember that movie Casper? Remember how I wanted to make out with Devon Sawa at the end when he turns into a real boy? You totally ruined that for me. And now THIS.

PS- Did you know Devon Sawa is a total badass?!? Not that I still stalk him. Or anything...

The "Redhead"?

Isn't it scary when the lights go out and all the trolls around your room go and rape your electronics?

Do you know what is scarier?

When your iPod births THIS!

Something Isn't Adding Up Here...

Rihanna, baby, baby. Where to begin?

You've had a rough year, we all know that. You are sporting your trademark pleather outfit, and you ROCK it. But the lipstick? This brassy redhair? You're one leopard print shirt away from being my Grandma in Florida, when she frosts her lips and gels her hair for a "night out" at the Red Lobster.

Nice shades though...

Oaahhhhh.....

Oh.... BALLZ ON MY CHIN. ohh.....

Sorry, I just blacked out for a sex sec.

Even with your sexually explicit mustache, I still want your balls on my chin.